Reading my book is like attending the best relationship conference for men that you ever attended. For a fraction of the cost too.
Where do good men go wrong?
Why are you not respected?
What does your wife want?
Answers to these and many other questions are answered in my new book.
The truth is that sometimes we feel more comfortable with one person than another. And when it comes to counseling, many men would rather talk about their issues with another man. The problem is that too much of what passes for counseling among men is really more like support, bonding, or guy talk. If you need help with your golf swing, your buds or the guys in the club house will be fun to talk to. They may be supportive and understanding. But what you need is a first rate swing coach.
So when it comes to counseling, it's easy to find a sympathetic ear or support. But what you need is counseling that is more like coaching. In other words, someone who know what they are talking about, can give you some really good tips and send you on your way so you can start practicing doing the right thing the right way.
So let's say that you recognize that you need some help--with relationship issues, home/work balance, anger management, or whatever. What you are hoping for is a really good coach or mentor. Someone who has been there, done that. Someone who is like a senior manager who can mentor you, offer some practical common sense advice, and then be there occasionally, if you need a little more feedback.
Perhaps most importantly, you want to hear it from an authority you can respect. Like a father, grandfather or successful senior mentor. You also don't want them to undermine your authority. It would also be nice if you could work one on one with the person--someone who wants to help you instead of seeing you as the problem. You would also like it to be one on one, not two or three against one.
Perhaps you decide to turn to the clergy--a minister or a chaplain. This is good because the pastor or chaplain will hopefully see you as a person, a person with mind, body and soul--and treat you as a whole person.
Someone once said that being nice means being weak. We like nice people. Nice people are easy to be around. Nice people make you feel comfortable.
I know too many men who are nice--they go to work every day, they are home every evening, they are a nice guy--and their family walks all over them. Mom is in charge, and she resents him for his weakness. There has to be an answer. And there is. It's like avoiding the extremes, but not quite. It's more like firm but fair. It means loving justice and what is right, and standing for what is right, but with a twinkle in your eye. A man needs patience, kindness, tender heartedness, long suffering, and gentleness. But he also needs to STAND FOR SOMETHING.